I feel blah. Lost. Withdrawn. I don't feel like talking to anyone, but that's not a realistic "want". It actually really bugs my husband and he gets quite annoyed with me when I withdraw and don't talk to him. Sure, I speak to him, but I don't really *talk* to him. I don't know why; I'm just so caught up in my own thoughts that I don't realise I'm not talking to anyone; not *really* talking. But I also don't really know what the thoughts are that are consuming me and are making me this way.
All I know is that I don't want to be around people.
Two weeks until my hysterectomy. I'm now off all my endometriosis/PCOS meds. Maybe somwe combination of those is a factor. Who knows? I sure as hell don't... I do know, however, that being of my gynae meds is not fun. The endo/PCO is coming back and it's hurting. Real, physical pain. I'm throwing various cocktails of period pain meds and pain killers at it without much success. My little TENS machine I use for my ankle pain has turned out to be brilliant for my cramps and lower back pain though! So that's also comforting in that it will probably be handy during my recovery.
In the mean time, I'll try to be talkative and "Grin and bear it."
to be continued...
I find the harder my ED works to withdraw me and isolate me and control me the harder I have to fight to not let it. I don't know whether this works for you - but I can do coffee with you wed morning if you want?? (no drs appt this week!!! eeek!!) xxxx
ReplyDeleteIt works like that for me too - I need to fight harder... Coffee Wed am would be great! xx
ReplyDeleteYou two are both beautiful and I am privileged to be able to read of struggles so much like my own.
ReplyDeleteHope you had a lovely coffee time together.
Jennifer xxoo